Them Wranch
Medium Rare CD - Orange Records

Before I got a chance to actually listen to this record my roommate got drunk and put it in the microwave because, “Hey man, it looks cool. Don’t be a dick.” When he put it in and pressed the button the disc almost immediately lit up with electric sparks. Tiny lightning bolts of red, green and blue started leaping off the disc. It spun around on the carousel, orbiting the center of the microwave. The interior exploded in different hues, flashing like thousands of miniature strobe lights. Eventually the light became more infrequent and dimmer until small flames developed. At this point my rommie popped open the door and grabbed the small, flaming disc and blew out the fire. “You gotta stop it quick, or they melt and that sucks. It only lasts like ten seconds but it looks sweet. Let’s put in that shitty emo-pop record you got next.” The press kit seemed pleasant and it seemed like something I might even like hearing, oh well. (Joshua Spainhoward)



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